


Feeling Green

by virryth



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Office, Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, M/M, One-sided feelings, Pining, author is woozidan/huihui, it ends alright this is my first angst ever, side!soonwoo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-29
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:20:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29071662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/virryth/pseuds/virryth
Summary: Jealousy is such an ugly emotion.
Relationships: Lee Jihoon | Woozi/Wen Jun Hui | Jun
Comments: 23
Kudos: 48





	1. Green with Envy

**Author's Note:**

> while laying in bed sketching portraits of jihoon and looping harry styles falling nonstop, i just had an urge to strong to write this that i got up from bed and poured out everything in an hour :<  
> hope everyone enjoys~ it's my first angst-ish fic but i never like sad endings so a part 2 can happen if someone wants :>
> 
> comments and kudos are always appreciated! <3

Jealousy is such an ugly emotion. 

It’s what Jihoon has started calling the emotion since he arrived at the banquet tonight. Another work function thrown by upper management when things get a little boring among the employees, and it’s not an exaggeration to say everyone here is having a good time. 

Everyone except Jihoon. It pains him to think about staying for the next ten minutes, much less a whole hour. Something has been on his mind since the start of the week, no, perhaps it started last month when he had seen Junhui laughing and joking with Kwon Soonyoung of HR at the last banquet. It’s crazy how a single glimpse of them together has affected his work. He’s lost focus in meetings, forgot to eat, and has stopped going to the break room altogether for fear he may see them again, for fear he may feel a nasty emotion when he does--for fear he may just snap and _do_ something about it, anything to break them apart. 

Even tonight, they’re standing so close that it drives him mad. What could Junhui possibly have to talk to Soonyoung with such close proximity their arms are basically touching? For what? For _why_ ?! And why does the thought of it alone bother Jihoon so much? It’s not like he’s dating him. Wen Junhui is just a coworker with a pretty smile. Someone who makes him feel better just by being close. They are, at most, _friends_ after the few hanging-outs they’ve done on the weekend. They’ve only been to a few movie hangouts where Jihoon had spent an absurd amount of time peeking at Junhui out of the corner of his eyes instead of focusing on the plot itself. Their relationship is so casual, Jihoon can’t even call those meetups _dates_ because who knows if Junhui goes to the movies with other people as well? 

_Like Soonyoung._

God, he’s so pathetic. It vexes him so much to see Junhui’s arm around Soonyoung’s shoulder, smiling in such a way that makes it hard for Jihoon to breath even as Junhui directs that smile towards someone else. Perhaps that is why Jihoon is walking over to them with not a thought in his brain, purely on impulse.

“Hey Hoonie!” Junhui calls out as he sees his department head. “Where have you been?”

_Not on your mind, clearly._

“Here and there,” he replies monotonously, eyeing the hand on Soonyoung’s shoulder that had magnetically pulled him all the way across the room. 

“We’re discussing where to go for round two after this.” Soonyoung smiles like nothing is wrong, and Jihoon wants so badly to smack that grin off his face. “Do you want to join us?”

 _Ah_ , he really wants to say no. Jihoon usually just goes home and crashes after a tiring work function, but Junhui looks at him with so much expectation in his eyes that the “ _sure_ ” escapes him before he can stop.

So here he sits, between Junhui and Soonyoung as they scream into the mic of a small coin karaoke booth, legs kicking a few empty soju bottles scattered at their feet. The feeling of Junhui’s arm touching him is driving him up another wall, and he would have instinctively scooted a bit further if Soonyoung hadn’t occupied the space on the other side. At least they’re not sitting together, Jihoon thinks, he did a good job claiming the middle spot from the get-go.

By one o’clock, Junhui has started to yawn, and Jihoon knows it’s time they should call it a night and head home. After much effort, he manages to shoo a drunk Soonyoung into a cab and pay the driver to take him straight home despite his protests. He was going to offer the same to Junhui, but the boy had suddenly taken interest in Jihoon’s car parked oddly on the curve when he had driven the both of them here. 

“Jihoon, are you still sober?” Junhui asks with a dip of his voice, a bit tipsy from the few sips he’s taken earlier. He leans against the car with both hands knitted together in a knot before him, swaying his head a little to the wind. 

“Yeah,” Jihoon breaths, “can you stand?”

Junhui nods and then shakes his head, giggling in that adorable way that sparks butterflies and waves of emotions all around him. Jihoon wonders if there is even anyone immune to this intoxicating aura he possesses because it’s affecting Jihoon way too much. It clogs his senses and pushes his mind into darkness, and it’s taking him so much just to resurface. 

Junhui stands up a little, shaking the drowsiness out of his eyes, and his hair flutters over his forehead, casting pretty dancing shadows across his features. He looks flushed, cheeks colored with shades of pink and oranges and the moles on his lips sit like perfect little stars when he smiles. 

“Did you have fun tonight?” Junhui hiccups and giggles at the sound. It drives Jihoon _insane_. 

“Yeah, I had a lot of fun. Did you?”

Junhui nods again, his head losing support by the seconds. He tilts to the side to look up at Jihoon. “I did thanks to you. Hehe. Can you take me home?” 

If Jihoon is breathless before, he might as well stop breathing now. His hand itches to reach out and brush the stray strand of hair covering Junhui’s eyes. He’s glad he didn’t drink a single drop today, if only Junhui knows how difficult it is for him to stand this close with both hands balled into fists in his pocket. 

It feels like this: the body, upon receiving massive waves of feelings, causes the heart to beat faster and traps all the air needed for survival in the lungs with the magnitude of its strength. Feelings that are so strong they cause havoc within the body and must be expelled as a natural defense, a natural reaction when something harmful resides inside. Yet, as the body does this, the mind stops it from happening as if it knows the catastrophe consequences for expelling that deep-rooted thorn. As if the moment it happens, the body will be dealt excruciating trauma with the eventual rejection. So instead it lets the feeling live and fester inside the body like cancer, feelings so intense they'll eventually kill all other inhabitants within the body day after day, but even then, it’s better for the body to die alone than dipping its toes into the open.

It’s better to keep quiet. Jihoon doesn’t want to risk his friendship with Junhui over his one-sided feelings.

“Sure.”

Junhui does not even know there is a bygone love poem written right here just for him. 


	2. Green with Joy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happiness has never felt so close.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey yall it's me again 'v' after the many requests/threats i've gotten for chapter 1, here is chapter 2 LOL the genre changed from angst to teeth-rotting fluff real quick.
> 
> enjoy! comments and kudos keep me going <3

Jihoon must look incredibly stupid right about now. 

He’d like to think he’s done all he can to push it down, to swallow it so he can move on, but no matter how much he convinces himself that it’s just a crush and that he’ll get over it with time, his heart refuses to acknowledge Junhui’s eventual absence. He’s changed his preferred entrance to the office, taking the west door instead of the east door straight from the garage to stop running into Junhui. He’s been taking later lunch breaks, timing it exactly after Junhui returns from his own so he won’t have to think of an excuse to refuse Junhui’s invitation to get lunch together. Jihoon has even changed the layout of his office so that his direct line of sight is the window, not Junhui’s desk, but all he’s gotten out of that is a stiff neck and the occasional side-eyes from the other staff. 

Nothing seems to work at this point. Jihoon had woken up with a headache bad enough to call off work today and is now just laying there sunbathing on the couch with thoughts full of Junhui. What would he be doing now, he wonders, probably at work talking to Soonyoung, or Jeonghan, or to anyone else but Jihoon. 

“How long are you gonna keep moping around?” His roommate, Jeon Wonwoo, uselessly comments.

Ever since he’s found out about Jihoon’s little crush on Wen Junhui, he hasn’t missed a chance to make fun of him. Soonyoung may be dense about these things, but one look at the both of them together and Wonwoo can tell right away how deep Jihoon is in over the moon for Junhui. He hasn’t let him live ever since.

“Don’t you have better things to do?” Jihoon groans underneath his blanket. “Like go outside? Or meet up with that boyfriend of yours?”

“If I ever liked going outside, we wouldn’t be roommates.” 

Fair. Their shared dislike for going outside was and still is the bond to their living arrangement afterall. It’s the main reason why Jihoon had continued to room with Wonwoo even after they graduated. Sometimes Jihoon regrets not choosing a job sector where he wouldn’t have to go outside, but he doubts he has any talent for journalism like Wonwoo. Though there _is_ one good thing with Wonwoo working at home, at least Jihoon won’t be lonely on days like this. 

“You know what, I _do_ need to get groceries today.” Wonwoo takes one look at his watch before grabbing his coat by the desk. “They should be here soon. I know you’re fine, but someone should stay with you nonetheless.”

“ _They?_ Who’s coming?”

Wonwoo pauses briefly before yanking the keys from their shared drawer, smirking like he knows something his friend doesn’t. He _always_ knows something Jihoon doesn’t.

“You’ll see.”

True to the prophecy, Soonyoung and Junhui show up fifteen minutes later with soup and medicine and anything a typical sick person would need. Jihoon must look incredibly stupid right about now, hiding half his face underneath the blanket as Junhui sits against the couch with his arms crossed. He’s going to strangle Wonwoo and Soonyoung the moment they get back from their stupid date. Just when his headache was finally getting better, they had to go and invite the cause of it to his own home, and it’s not like he can bolt to his room and lock himself in there. Junhui had come all the way here to keep him company afterall. 

“I don’t understand.” Jihoon can hear the pout in Junhui’s tone as he comments on the protagonist’s course of action. His back is against the cushion where Jihoon lays and his soft hair is close enough to touch. Jihoon fights the urge to reach out and ruffle his hair as he scowls at the developments of the movie currently on the projector. “Why would he assume it’s one-sided feeling when he hasn’t even confronted the person himself?”

 _Words._ “Maybe he doesn’t want to get hurt,” Jihoon mumbles, feeling too close to home. “Would you confess if you think the person you like has a crush on someone else?” 

“But that’s not for him to decide.” Junhui interjects, turning towards Jihoon. “His feelings are his own. Even if I know I’ll get rejected, at least I wouldn’t have any regret knowing I’d taken a shot at it.” 

Jihoon prides himself in his ability to stay focused, it’s one of his best attributes, but when Junhui sits so close, indirectly telling him he should confess, it’s very hard to keep his eyes away. It’s cancerous, really, how much it pains him to be so close yet the proximity is the panacea to it all. 

He’s known Junhui thanks to Wonwoo’s relationship with Soonyoung, and from the look of it, it seems he was already too late when he found out about his own feelings. Junhui had looked at Soonyoung the same way Soonyoung looked at Wonwoo, and probably the same way he looks at Junhui. There’s the obvious aura of admiration, but beneath the facade of friendship, Jihoon is sure Junhui has harbored his own feelings for Soonyoung throughout their college years. 

It’s the sole reason why Jihoon hasn’t confessed. Why add another burden on Junhui’s shoulder when he already suffers every single day having to watch the person he likes smile at someone else?

Jihoon has made up his mind to keep quiet even if it tears him apart on the inside, but Junhui being here in his hazy stupor has made that extremely difficult. Jihoon wishes he can be as brave as Junhui would like him to be. He wonders if Junhui had ever confessed to Soonyoung, had ever faced rejection upfront and moved on from it. He wonders if Junhui had cried himself to sleep like Jihoon sometimes does when his feelings become too much to bear alone.

The painkillers in his system are making him sleepy the more he listens to Junhui’s voice, sweet as a lullaby luring him to slumber. He feels himself relax for the first time since his friends have left, and slowly his eyes flutter close. 

_How can I when you have feelings for Soonyoung?_

If only he has the courage to say it aloud. How pathetic, Lee Jihoon. The opportunity is given to you on a platter yet you _continue_ to be constipated about it. 

“I don’t.”

Sure, of course that’s what he would say. 

“Hoonie, I don’t have feelings for Soonyoung.”

_…_

_Shit!_

His eyes shot open, and suddenly all Jihoon sees is how bad he’s going to crash and burn with whatever excuse his brain can come up with on the spot. He said it aloud. _He said it aloud!_

“Hoonie.” 

He can already see the astonishment, the _horror_ coloring Junhui’s features, his eyes opening all the way and folding his many eyelids to the back. His voice is soft, vibrating at the back of his throat as he calls Jihoon’s name again. Thrice now. But nothing comes out of Jihoon’s mouth besides the thunderous heartbeat anyone within a five miles radius would be able to hear. No excuse can possibly salvage what he had just done; the many steps he’s taken, the neck pain, the sleepless nights, all for nothing as he’s laid himself bare for Junhui to see in a moment of weakness. 

_Stupid! God, you’re so freaking stupid, Lee Jihoon. But wait! He doesn’t like Soonyoung?_

“Hey, Jihoon.” Junhui grabs his shoulders to shake him out of it, worried eyes searching his own for any sign of potential hyperventilation. “Shh, breath with me.”

He complies, following Junhui’s guide as he breathes in and out, slowly, calmly holding onto his gaze. It takes him a few minutes to control his breathing, and a few more for the muscle spasms in his arms and shoulders to fade. He feels his own body again when the warmth from Junhui’s hands seep into his senses. 

“Are you alright? Look at me, Hoonie.”

He looks at Junhui as he holds himself together, trembling slightly from the contact and the small distance between them. He can’t run away anymore, not when Junhui has shown him a sliver of what it would be like to have his feelings reciprocated, to be cared for in the company of such gentle arms and comforting voice. So he takes the plunge--he’s already half-way down anyway. 

“I’m always looking at you.”

Junhui takes in a sharp breath, eyes moving from one to another, and smiles sweetly. That iconic closed-mouth smile of his that highlights the little stars on his upper lip.

“I know.”

“You… _do_?”

Junhui is laughing at this point. Jihoon can’t understand what he finds so funny all of a sudden. 

“I may be dense, but I’m not _Soonyoung-dense_. I thought something was different when you left early on that camping trip.”

Camping trip…? Camping trip. The trip three months ago where he had had enough of Soonyoung and had left in the middle of the night-- _that’s_ how long he’s known? Jihoon suddenly wants to dig a hole in the ground, crawl into it, and never see the sun again.

“You changed your office layout because of me, didn’t you?” Junhui continues, finding it cute how red Jihoon has gotten despite his poker face. He’s started kneeling at this point, coming closer as he swings Jihoon’s hands back and forth playfully. “I was waiting for you all this time, dummy. That karaoke night, too, you should have said something when I asked you to take me home.”

 _God._ Jihoon must look so stupid right about now. 

“It’s true I’d thought I liked Soonyoung for a while, but when they started dating, I realized I was just being overprotective, like a big brother looking out for my sibling, or like how you are of me when they started making out in front of us sometimes.”

The little giggles Jihoon adores has never sounded so tormenting until now. 

“Stop,” Jihoon begs, head hanging so low his forehead will soon touch his knees. “Please stop talking.”

“Hmm?” Junhui tilts his head low to meet his eyes, his voice dripping with honey and teasing. “Why?”

“I-” Jihoon stutters, covering his face with a hand. “I’ll become greedy.”

“Silly.” Junhui takes his chin on his palms and brings him closer, forcing Jihoon to look him in the eye. Junhui takes in all that he’s laid bare, stripped of the facade he’s hidden behind all this time--his kindness, protectiveness, and the stuttering, blushing mess before him. “Then I’ll say it first. _I like you,_ Hoonie, for a long time. Now, if you feel the same, nod your head for me.”

Jihoon nods, slowly but eagerly as he squints his eyes in embarrassment. He feels like a child finally admitting faults after lying about something for so long.

“That’s it. Easy, right?”

Junhui’s boxy smile gives him an inkling that he might have chosen the movie on purpose, but he can’t even bring himself to be upset about it. The impossible has happened; he’d cure the cancerous disease that grips his heart and lungs, his headache is also completely gone from all the adrenaline and dopamine produced in the short period of time he’s held Junhui’s hands. He’s so happy that he’ll willingly forgive Soonyoung and Wonwoo for orchestrating this whole ordeal when they return. 

**Author's Note:**

> as usual, we love junhui <3
> 
> find me on twitter @wenwooz!


End file.
